skeleton news art opening, or don't fucking tell me to shut up -ever

in attending the skeleton news 'art' show (their scare quotes. i'd have put them around show not art, personally), i got into no less than three fights -probably more but i was almost blacked-out.

fight 1:
this girl i had met in minneapolis at the art shanties was being really fucking insulting and talking down to me super bad like i didn't know anything about art. so after a few minutes of it, i just looked at her and was like "i don't understand why you're bothering to talk to me if you think i'm so stupid. it's totally inappropriate to make other people feel bad so you can feel more validated in discussing art. fuck you." i was also wasted. and then we argued for a while and she apologized which did not make me feel better about the interaction because i know, if given the chance, she would do it again.

fight 2:
this french dude was trying to hit on me for a really long time and i clearly wasn't into it. and then was like (in french accent): "i know you are a lesbian but do you think we can make out anyway?" what the fuck! so i started trying to explain to him why that was fucked up/stupid.

fight 3:
and then while trying to get this french dude to not 1)skeeze out on me 2)figure out why this was the third person this week that thought i was a lesbian (which is obv cool and everything) 3)get this dick to get why saying that is totally not cool regardless of how i identify, this other super annoying serious guy was all "can you be quiet please? my friend is about to start a performance." and i was all "no fucking way!" and tried to explain to this dude (who was wearing an unbearably stupid hat too) why 1)you can't tell me to shut up ever 2) if you understood what we were talking about you would totally get why i wasn't being my normal respectful (quiet) art lover self so you should listen to the urgency of what i am trying to convey 3) no seriously, you don't get to tell me to shut up, asshole.

it was by far the most exciting opening i have been to in a long time, even if the lights were too low to see the art if one could even get close to it which you couldn't because it was way too crowded. i got to hang out with lizzie and she said i was explaining things with my hips all night which i think means i was excited and having fun. granted, as it was hannah's birthday, i had been drunk since brunch and was all reved up because we ate awesome food and then watched rubin and ed and saw hamilton's article on drugs that just came out in vice.

goals: more fights at art shows, getting my cat to eat a whole watermelon