Thursday, September 11, 2008

event horizon

i just got called a "provincial, narrow-minded townie" after shaming a chubby obv ghey dude who kept making billie holiday references -okay, we get it- called my haircut "dykey," referred to me dimissively as a "hipster," and suggested that guns and roses was a an unknown indie band.

after i rose up on the bench of the booth in the pizza parlor and asked if he was actually calling me xenophobic with his fly down (it was), he quickly demanded how many continents i could claim to have lived on.


no, wait. really?

i fought all urges to ask him if there was a Rent curtain call he was missing, and told him he and his parents' credit cards weren't welcome in my town. when did small town, new-money drama club presidents get to shame me for not being worldly? plz tell me more about your trip to venice. plz wear shrunken microfiber ill-fitting button-ups from h&m while trying to mock my style. plz cut me down for actually finding the things i like and living as a full participant in a culture i support and create. plz expect more reports of fights beginning from someone making fun of my hair in the pizza place at 3:30 after telling me about how they just discovered animal collective and it is "beautiful."

and school has only been in session for two weeks.

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